Dear Vincent, 
I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days. 
Love, Papa  

A few days later he received a letter from his son. 

Dear Papa,  
Don’t dig up that garden. That’ s where the bodies are buried. 
Love,  Vinnie

At 4 a.m. The next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.  That same day the old man received another letter from his son.  

Dear Papa, 
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now.  That’s the best I could do under the circumstances. 
Love you, Vinnie

Jolanda Hennekam from Groningen Holland

The webmaster of UrbanLegendsOnline.com is a gardener too!
Visit my NJ gardening blog at MyNJGarden.com
And now back to your regularly scheduled urban legends.

You gotta love Robin Williams…… Even if he’s nuts! Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan. What we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.

Robin Williams’ plan…(Hard to argue with this logic!)

"I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here’s one plan."

1.      "The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those "good ‘ole’ boys", we will never "interfere" again.

2.      We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany , South Korea , the Middle East, and the Philippines. They don’t want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.

3.      All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We’ll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They’re illegal!!! France will welcome them.

4.      All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don’t like it there, change it yourself and don’t hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don’t need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.

5.      No foreign "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don’t attend classes, they get a "D" and it’s back home baby.

6.      The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing non polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7.      Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don’t like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)

8.      If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere." They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9.      Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don’t need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10.  All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH…learn it…or LEAVE…Now, isn’t that a winner of a plan?

"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying ‘Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.’ She’s got a baseball bat and she’s yelling, ‘you want a piece of me?’ "

If you agree with the above forward it to friends…If not, and I would be amazed, DELETE it!!

Robin Williams did say the final quote about the statue of Liberty, but the rest cannot be positively identified as a quote from Robin Williams.

Posted via email from Urban Legends Online

A young woman was driving alone one night near the local Insane Asylum when she heard on the radio that a dangerous Lunatic had escaped. Within minutes she heard a pop and felt one of her tires go flat. She built up her nerve and got out and began to change the tire.

Just as she slid the spare on she noticed a man in a plain white uniform staring at her from the bushes. Startled, she dropped the lug nuts and heard them scatter on the ground, as she vainly searched in the darkness for the scattered lug nuts she heard the man slowly approaching.

Terrified, she asked herself in a trembling voice, "What am I going to do now?"

The lunatic replied "Why don’t you take one nut from each of the other wheels and put them on the spare?"

She did, and was soon on her way.

Farah Jama from Ontario, Canada

Read more at http://urbanlegendsonline.com

Posted via email from Urban Legends Online