While cooking dinner one night, Aunt G. opened the cupboard. She intended to pull out some flour, but instead she received a nasty surprise. A python jumped out at her. She slammed the cabinet, and with lightning speed, all three hundred pounds of her made it down the street to a neighbor in less than thirty seconds. From there she called the police.
When the cops arrived on the scene, one of them opened that same cabinet. The snake again lashed out, but this time succeeded in making contact with the officer’s chest. Luckily however, it sunk its teeth into a mouthful of bullet proof vest. He then slung it to the ground, step on it’s head, and chopped it off.
After a brief investigation, it was discovered that the previous year, a neighbor had kept a python as a pet. It had gotten loose and they’d been unable to locate it. Until now….